Pregnancy "The Journal" - Episode 1

Here is what I want to do. I want to use this blog as a way to keep track of exactly what I experience throughout this pregnancy. That doesn't mean that I will cease to blog about other things, but I want to have a way to look back and see what I was doing/feeling/thinking etc. I want to be able to read back over this when my baby is all grown up and she/he will be able to have a real look at what their mommy was like.

Stats:

I got pregnant on either August 21st or August 24th. These are the days that my husband and I were together while the ovulation test was showing high LH levels. However, my last period started on August 7th so that is when pregnancy starts calculating according to the doctors, books, and websites that I have been on so far. So according to that method of thinking, I am currently in my 5th week of pregnancy.

This is what my belly looks like at 5 weeks of pregnancy (photo taken at 7:45am on 9/9/08). Nothing new and different! I also weighed myself this morning and came in at 175.5. This is actually good. I have been trying to lose weight for a while now and have gone from 183 to 175.5 so I will be happy with that. At my last OB/GYN annual exam, the doctor told me that she did not feel like my weight was an issue. I am tall and therefore can carry more weight without it being a health risk.

Misc:

I am going to attempt to eat really good and I want to start walking daily to help keep the weight gain to a manageable/ healthy range. I have read that not gaining anything in the first trimester is ideal, but up to 5 pounds is healthy too. I have also read about women that gained like 12 and were totally fine, so I am not going to stress about it too much. I am just going to shoot for being as healthy as possible and leave it at that.

I want to enjoy ever second of being pregnant! I am sort of even looking forward to having morning sickness, just so that I know that everything is going along as it should.

Feelings:

I am feeling slightly weepy about everything. I don't even need to be watching something cute on TV. I can just be thinking about the baby and how soon I will be able to feel it kick and then I will tear up. I have not out and out cried yet, I have been able to blink it all back at this point. The last week or so, I have felt mostly normal PMS type stuff, like being tired, a bit bloated, sore boobs, grouchy, etc. Since I did not know that I was pregnant at that time I can't really be clear on the exact symptoms. I am feeling some slight cramping, which I read is totally normal, but not a little freaky. I keep thinking that it means something bad, and then I starting thinking about the possible bad stuff, and start feeling a little panic that something might go wrong. So, then I have to cut off the negative thinking and tell myself how everything is going to be fine, over and over. I hear that this is normal too.

Physically:

My boobs are sore, and I would say that they are slightly more sore than they are when I am getting ready to start my period, but not horrible yet. I think that I am outgrowing my bra though, so that will be on the shopping list this weekend. I want something soft and stretchy that will fit now, but expand as I do without hurting me. I will probably invest in a few workout bras too, since the ones I have are already tight.

Again, before I knew that I was pregnant, I had been feeling slightly tired, but not major fatigue. The morning after we found out, I was feeling a little blah, but not generally bad. I was sort of thinking that this was all in my head - I mean really, what really changed between Sunday and Monday? I found out, nothing else - therefore, all in my head.

Today, I feel more generally bad. I am cold and choked on my vitamins and my nose is running just a little (like it does when you are cold). I sort of have that slightly achy feeling like you get when you are coming down with something. God, I really hope that I am not getting sick! I also woke up at 4am unable to get back into a good sleep. I went to bed at 9:30, so not too early - not sure what the deal was with that!

General Thoughts:

I was really surprised to look at the picture above and not feel all grossed out about how fat I look. What I see now is a fairly flat belly that is going to get bigger and bigger with the new life that I have been chosen to carry. I am excited and happy and I can hardly wait to tell people. I have already told the HR lady (she is a good friend too, but I mainly needed insurance advice). I also told another girl, because I really like her and she asked me yesterday and I lied about it and really felt horrible about lying to her. Smug-Hub has told a few people here too, but we are planning to keep it quiet until after the first doctor visit.

I have an appointment on October 3rd at 8:30am - this will be the first exam and everything. They want to do an ultrasound then too, which I think is pretty common now, but I am concerned about doing anything that might have even a .0000001% chance of causing harm. I am also thinking about interviewing a few other doctors to make that I find the best. I really like my doctor, but just like when we were getting married, we wanted to get a few estimates to make sure we got the best, we want to make sure that we get the very best doctor too - our baby deserves to have only the very best! Besides, I am going to be putting my trust, my body, my life, and my baby's life in this person's hands, I have to be able to trust them.

The plan for today is to look online to see if there are local hypnobirthing classes and find out when we should start those. I also want to check out some websites that Becky told me about and call a midwife friend of mine (who is all the way in Florida) to get her thoughts and suggestions for finding a Doula and perhaps someone local that could suggest a good doctor.

Now, I think that I will take myself to the car for a little mid-day nap!