Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Fazing In or Resisting Taco Bell

My mother-in-law is coming for a visit in a few days and staying almost two weeks. Since her visit will not really allow me to keep any kind of normal routine (because we will be sightseeing and Smug-Hub will be off work), I have decided to let the time between now and her departure be a fazing in period for my new commitment to health and fitness.

I will make the best food choices possible given the fact that she will probably take of the kitchen while here and make all kinds of yummy deliciousness! Also, while here we are going to take her for a few days to Historic Williamsburg, so working out to my videos will not be possible. So, I am going to do my videos when possible and start easing into this new plan. Then once her visit is complete, I will be ready to hit it hard and fast!!

I was very proud of myself yesterday. I was starving, I had been doing stuff around the house all day and running some errands and I forgot to eat lunch. So, I was heading home for day and just started feeling sick I was so hungry. I knew that Taco Bell was on the way home and since Smug-Baby was asleep in the back seat, I knew I could get through the drive through and eat a nice Cheesy Bean and Rice burrito all the way home. I kept telling myself how it would take the edge off my hunger and how it would be so hard to cook anything once I got home and the baby was awake and wanting to play. But, I resisted!! I drove right past the evil fast food and home!

Once there I realized that I had left over pizza with broccoli and spinach from the weekend, so I heated that up and had two slices. The pizza satisfied my need for intimidate food, but all the veggies made me feel less guilty about eating it! Score!

I also did not do my workout videos yesterday. The biggest reason is that I simply forgot. I am not yet in the habit of doing them, so once I got home and looked at my to do list and got started caulking the bathtub and fixing the coffee table and washing baby clothes and so on, I just didn't think about working out all day. It wasn't until this morning when I woke up that I realized that I hadn't done them. So I guess I need to start putting them on my to do list daily until I get into the routine.

I should have remembered since I was feeling the hike from the weekend all day :)

Monday, August 30, 2010

This Weekend

I spent most of the afternoon Friday cleaning the house. This means that I scrubbed the bathroom while singing the bouncy baby song to Smug-Baby while she jumped around in the Johnny Jump-up, dusted with her in the Mei Ti, washed dishes and mopped the floors while she played in the Exer-saucer, changed the sheets and towels while she played on the bedroom floor. During her naps I emptied the trash and dusted areas I could not reach while she was attached to me. This teething thing makes her just a touch more needy, a touch more irritable. She wants to always be able to see me and would prefer that I was sitting beside her while she plays. By the end of the day I was beyond exhausted and shaking with fatigue and hunger (because I forgot to eat lunch).

Smart ole' Smug-Hub took one look at me and the house when he got home and declared that dinner was going to be out and on him. We got Chinese take-out and after eating, he took Smug-Baby downstairs so I could vacuum (she hates the vacuum now for some reason). I decided after all that work that I needed a hot shower. I took the opportunity to shave my legs and after getting clean had daddy bring the baby to me and got her clean too.

We all went to bed clean and smelling sweet on clean sheets in a clean house! I feel so much peace when my house is clean!

A friend I haven't seen in several months came over for brunch Saturday morning and that was lovely. I worked on laundry and washed diapers, but Saturday was mostly spent playing with Smug-Baby on the floor and relaxing.

My dad called in the late afternoon to tell me that my cousin had passed away. She was about a year younger than I am and had a young son. She had a lot of problems and has spent the last several years in jail for crimes related to drug addiction. She had only been out about 3 weeks and the details of her death are still unclear. This news has me in shock. She is the second of my cousins to pass away too young and I keep hearing over and over in my head that I thought there would be more time.

I loved my childhood playmate who was full of fun and humor with a deep belly laugh that was so infectious that you couldn't help being pulled into whatever the joke was. I remember eating junk food and watching movies, staying up all night and sleeping most of the day. I loved her, but I never got to know the woman she had become. I never knew the wife and mother she was or the details of daily life. While 3 hours is not really that long, we lived far enough apart that we only saw each other once or twice a year and then not at all after she went to jail.

The last time I saw her was at our grandmother's funeral and I have to say he were both so caught up in our own grief that I don't remember if we even spoke.

Rest in peace my darling girl, I know that now you are free of the problems of this world. You are loved and you will be missed.

Moving on to Sunday. Smug-Hub and I took the baby for a hike up to this large star that overlooks our city and it was lovely to be out in the sun and listen to the birds. Smug-Baby loved being outside and "talked" most of the way up until she fell asleep. I had her in the pack all the way up (thinking that I would pass her off when I got too tired) and Smug-Hub had all the way down, which turned out to be a good thing, because I kept rolling my ankles and would have fallen if I'd had her on my back!

We then came home to shower up and head out for a hardy breakfast, totally undoing any weight loss benefits :) Then he treated me to a pedicure to help ease the tension I had accumulated from grief as well as the physical output from house work and hiking. It was lovely and I left feeling like I could face anything.

We spent the rest of the afternoon working on little things around the house. He cleaned up some of his fishing equipment and I worked on packing up the baby clothes that are too small for her. He made dinner while I folded the last of the laundry. He cleaned up while I got the baby ready for bed. My dad came by on his way home from my uncle's and ate dinner with us and filled us in on what he knew about my cousin's death. I think that it helped him to be around a smiling baby and the comfort of good food and the love of his family.

I think that the funeral will be this week and I hope that I can make arrangements to be there. I almost feel like if I don't go then I can pretend that it didn't happen and that I will just see her at the next family Thanksgiving...

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Get in Shape Plan

OK, so I have been giving this whole get into shape plan some thought and I think that I have come up with some short term goals and a plan of action on how to get there. I would like to lose 30 pounds by Thanksgiving, that is about 2 1/2 pounds a week which is safe and should be doable.

In order to get there I need to eat only healthy foods and work exercise into every day.

So, I have created a simple diet plan that contains some fruit, lots of veggies, whole grains and non-animal protein sources (since dairy is so hard on my system). Cutting out sugars and processed foods. I took into consideration my limited budget and am using frozen veggies to cut costs. Putting this information into BabyFit, comes to 1830 calories a day, which is a lot less than I tend to eat now, but not so low that my breastfeeding will be effected.

As for working out, I am going to do my 8 minute videos and the slim-in-6 videos on the weekdays (a total of less than 1 hour a day) and a bike ride or hike on Saturday's and Sunday's. This isn't so much exercise a day to be overwhelming but enough to start seeing results. Each activity is cardio and strength combined.

My reward for reaching the Thanksgiving goal will be to shop for some new clothes! Not to mention showing off a better looking body at holiday events!!

Wish me luck!!

Friday, August 27, 2010

Starting Solids

Smug-Hub wants to start letting Smug-Baby taste a few food items, not really start her getting her nutrition from solids, but just wants to see how she likes some fruit or something. I am really opposed to this idea. I know from my extensive reading of parenting books, articles and online sources that babies should not be given anything (even water) but their mother's milk for AT LEAST 6 months and Smug-Baby is only 6 months and 4 days old. I know introducing solids too early increases a baby's risk of allergies and leaky gut syndrome. I know that breastmilk is perfect and introducing solids will actually create a nutritional deficiency. Once solids are started, you nurse less, so starting solids is also the beginning of weaning. Once solids are started, there is an increased chance of illness, because again, a nutritional deficiency has been created. Babies don't NEED solids until their have their teeth! The cave men/women did not have Gerber, they did not create fancy little purees for their babies!

Smug-Baby is healthy! She is over 6 months old and never been sick (besides the runny nose when teething), she is never hungry, she is over weight for her age and she is happy watching us eat without joining! There is no reason to start introducing foreign items into her clean and perfect little body. It would kill me if we did something that I was uncomfortable with that turned out to be harmful to her and I would have a hard time not blaming Smug-Hub for rushing me. 

All that being said, Smug-Hub is not really talking about starting to introduce the replacing of a meal of nursing with a meal of solids. What he wants is to give her some watermelon to play with and let her put some of it in her mouth and see what she thinks.

I told him that we would start as soon as he installs the diaper sprayer in the bathroom. Here is the other little dirty secret about starting solids - the diaper contents will change dramatically!! What are now nice, small, no smell diapers, will become really potent and will require a haz-mat suit to change!! I don't think that he understands just how much the diaper contents will change and don't think he is ready for that :)

I want to do what is best for her. My wanting to keep her a baby longer is not a good reason to put off starting solids. His wanting to see what things she likes and him being ready for this milestone is not a good reason to start! It's not about what we want, its about what is best for her and I just don't think introducing solids at this time is what would be best for her.

So, I am not going to bring it up. If he talks about when we can start letting her taste things, I will reply as to the status of sprayer and until he gets it installed, I have a solid food reprieve!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Struggles to get Motivated

I need some help here people. I really want to get in shape! I have lost all 33 pounds of pregnancy weight (actually that was all gone about 4 weeks after Smug-Baby was born) but I am not where I need to be to healthy and fit and feeling good. I need to lose more poundage true, but I really want to be fit and firm and most importantly feeling good.

I feel like it is a struggle to play on the floor with my sweet baby girl, because my back hurts all the time and it is hard to get up and down. I have no flexibility anymore and very little strength. I think back to the days when I was thin and strong. I worked in a gym and worked out everyday for a good hour. I have always tried to make exercise part of my routine but as I have gotten older it has dwindled down to almost nothing. Now, instead of exercise being something that I just do, it is a struggle and a hardship.

I purchased a bike last year and rode a couple times a week until I got too big and pregnant to keep it up and since the beginning of spring my dad and I have taken weekly 10 mile rides every Saturday morning. Every Friday I take a power walk with my mom, so it's not like I get no exercise, but it's not enough! I need to do more.

Becks and Jen have both inspired me to get up and moving and I decided that I would simply do the 8 Minute series each day. Then in a few weeks add the Slim-in-6 program DVD that I purchased a few years ago and really liked. Then the sore throat started and that people is where I am today.

I am tired of being tired and feeling sick and since the sore throat is feeling slightly better today, I think that I have to start doing this plan in a day or so. Maybe I should start over the weekend? Give myself time to get feeling totally better?

Bottom line, I need to get moving and I need to clean up my diet! No more eating 13 of Pioneer Woman's wonderful molasses cookies instead of lunch (OMG they totally rock though!!) I am putting it out there, letting everyone know that I am committing to getting back to feeling good!!

How hard can it be? The 8 minute videos are just that 8 minutes each! I can find a few 8 minute slices of time in which to start getting back in shape and the Slim-in-6 video is only something like 25 minutes! Add that daily to my weekly walks and bike rides and I should be back in shape in no time!!

Oh look, there is leftover Pineapple Upside-Down Cake...

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Smug-Baby is 6 Months Old

Smug-Baby is 6 months old. She is growing so fast that I can hardly believe it! Here are a few notable things about my 6 month old girl!

She military crawls all over the house. She can get anywhere she wants to go using her feet/knees and elbows to scoot to her desired destination.

She has one small tooth cutting through her gum, the bottom left front tooth and the bottom right front tooth seems to be close behind. This teething has her nose running a bit and she is more irritable. She is a really happy baby, but the effect of teething has her crying out in frustration more and she has awoken screaming in pain a few times.

She has decided that she no longer likes noises out of the ordinary. She hates the vacuum with a passion, she cries at the sight of it, not just the noise. She does not like the dish washer or the mixer either and will do that climb-up-you-crawl thing when something is turned on and cry pitifully in fear.

She is also starting to have a fear of strangers unless she is held tightly by mom or dad. She doesn't like being in the high-chair when strangers are at the table, or playing on the floor when strangers come over to visit.

She has started this thing where she wiggles her wrist, almost like a wave, but it can be with a closed fist, or while she has something in her hand.

She acts like a crack-head getting a fix whenever there is a glass of ice water around; shaking her arms and legs in excitement and this look of total joy and desire on her face. She will start at the bottom of the glass and suck on the condensation, then work her way up to the top and try to "drink" like mom and dad do.

We did get her a sippy cup and she enjoys sucking in some water, grinning at us and spitting the water out across the room and all down her front.

She no longer likes to have her daddy and I out of her line of sight; even if one of us is holding her or playing with her and the other leaves the room she will momentarily make her dislike of this known.

She is easily distracted. We are able to take the shoe that was left laying around the house out of her mouth (yuck) and replace it with a toy. This love of shoes and other non-toys has her daddy and I scrambling to get the house baby-proofed since she is suddenly a lot more mobile.

She still smiles and charms strangers and family alike and is so beautiful it takes my breath away to look at her. She is love and light and I am beyond lucky that she chose me to be her mama!

Monday, August 23, 2010

Birthday Weekend

My darling, Smug-Hub, turned 35 this weekend. I did my very best to make his day and the whole weekend really, super nice for him. Since money is tight, his gift consisted of a book on fly-fishing, an iTunes gift card and the new Kevin Hart DVD, Seriously Funny I think that he liked his gifts as well as the Saturday morning breakfast of french toast and a BLT.

We also went downtown to his favorite restaurant for lunch and to visit a few of his favorite stores. Then in the evening we had all the family over for a cookout and there was so much food, that we will probably be eating for the rest of the week without having to cook anything new!

His phone kept beeping with Facebook updates from his friends and family posting birthday wishes. He also received a few gift cards and some Dallas Cowboys stupid crap fan gear. I made pineapple upside-down cake after calling him mother to get her recipe and he said that it was great and just like being at home.

He got to eat his favorite foods, sleep in, spend time with Smug-Mama and Smug-Baby, go fishing and get gifts! He said that it was a perfect birthday weekend!! I am exhausted!! It's hard work making someones weekend perfect!

I have been fighting some sinus crap for a while now, I start feeling badly so I take vitamin D and Emergen-C and try to rest and it goes away without really developing into anything major. The problem is that it keeps coming back and I really don't have the option to be sick and I can't take anything that will dry up the drainage in my sinuses because it would also dry up Smug-Baby's food supply!! So, I just deal with these occasional days of feeling less than 100% and hope for the best.

Last night, I promised myself that as soon as the baby is no longer nursing and no longer sleeping in our bed, I will take some NyQuil or something else that will not my ass out for 12 hours and just sleep and sleep and wake up feeling good and not more tired!

I love that she sleeps with us, because I am tired all the time now and can't imagine if I had to get out of bed and go get her from another bed or another room to nurse in the middle of the night. If I had to I would be a zombie!! As it stands now, I just have to roll over and aim the boob towards her face and go back to sleep!! It is so totally easy, but I'm still tired :) 

It's a new week and with it comes a new weeks worth of dust and laundry and the like, but it also brings more changes and growth from Smug-Baby, so all in all, life it really great!!

Happy Birthday honey, I love you forever and always!!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I Believe...

What you believe is important. What others believe is only important to them. Gisele Bundchen, the super model has recently come under fire for making a comment that it should be a law that all women breastfeed their babies for at least 6 months. While she has now released a statement of a kind of apology, people are all in an uproar about this comment. You can read an example of this "outrage" in the New York post at this link.

I think that when it comes to parenting, people tend to be very defensive of their choices and if you choose to raise your child differently than I do, that I might feel like this is some kind of slap in my face, that you are telling me that I raised my child "wrong". Also, I think that when people choose something they know in their hearts is not the best choice, they are often even more defensive of that choice.

Personally, I have a set of beliefs, be them about parenting, God, food, politics, whatever. Here is the thing, I am entitled to the way I believe, you don't have to follow my belief system or even believe the same things that I do, but I have the right to voice them and believe them. So does this model, Gisele, she was not saying that everyone had to do as she said, or feel the same way she does, she was just voicing her thoughts on a subject and she has every right to do so. So what if she thinks their should be a law? I don't see law makers running around trying to get this breastfeeding law on the books just because Gisele said it should be so!!

That being said, I think that I should put a few of my beliefs out there. They are mine and mine alone, you don't have to agree, you don't have to do what I say, I don't even have to do what I say, but I'm putting them out there anyway!

1) I Believe that breastfeeding is best. I believe that breastfeeding is undermined by powerful formula companies who make it seem OK if a person chooses not to feed their child the way God intended - and it is a choice. Almost everyone is able to breastfeed given correct information and quality support by an educated person (sorry, nurses and doctors and mothers who have breastfed in the past don't count). I believe it is a crying shame that so many women are made to feel badly for nursing and given all the reasons why they shouldn't do it, try or continue. Nursing is a gift that I personally would not trade for a million dollars and feel so sorry for those who don't get to share this amazing bond with their child.

2) I believe that vegan is the healthiest way to eat. Now, I'm a vegetarian but I am not always dairy free, I try but I am not always successful. I know that I feel better about myself and my stomach doesn't hurt and I feel healthy when I cut dairy from my diet, but it is hard to maintain a social life, eating out when both meat and dairy free, so this is a struggle for me. However, that struggle does not negate my belief that not eating animal products is best.

3) I believe that everyone has choices and as long as they make those choices consciously then I am fine with it. However, I hate when someone is a sheep, doing something without giving it any thought. Why does one choose public school for their child? Why did someone choose disposable diapers for their baby? Why did this person choose bottle-feeding? Why do people choose to eat meat? Why do some choose not to co-sleep with their child? Why do some people choose to use spanking as a form of discipline? Why did someone choose to circumcise? I don't mind that someone may have chosen something different from what I chose, but when I ask these questions, I don't want to see blank expressions on their faces, I want to hear about what led to this choice. Perhaps we can educate each other!

I believe that our beliefs are part of what makes us special and unique, and listening to why people believe one way or another can only help increase tolerance. What would happen if our world was a tolerant one? What if everyone believed that everyone else had the right to their own belief system - that might be the key to world peace right there!! But hey, that's just what I believe :)

Smug-Niece

She is so beautiful! She is a total contrast from Smug-Baby. Smug-Baby is dark, dark hair, dark eyes, porcelain skin. Smug-Niece has blond hair, blue eyes and is so pink all over you just want to eat her like a cupcake!

She has the softest thickest hair I have ever seen on a baby and long!! The nurse styled her hair into a Mohawk of all things! It is the first thing Smug-Sister noticed when she was wheeled to the nursery window too! "Get that Mohawk off my baby and get that baby to my room!!!"

She weighed in at 8 pounds, 15 ounces and is 20 inches long. She was born at 2:18pm on August 10, 2010. She is perfect and lovely and wonderful and totally loved!

I introduced Smug-Baby to her cousin and she seemed fairly nonplussed, but I feel that will change. I predict that within 1 year, they will become best pals and spend their childhoods playing together and being close as sisters!

Smug-Niece is so small compared to Smug-Baby! They were almost the same size at birth, but Smug-Niece feels so light and tiny! I can't imagine her being any smaller, like if she had been 6 pounds of something! She is just so small and cute and I had a hard time letting her parents take her back into their loving embrace.

I can't wait to get back over to the hospital to squeeze her again!

Friday, August 13, 2010

Sleeping

The last few nights have been tough. Smug-Baby has been waking and wanting to play at about 2am the last couple of nights. She normally wakes a bit to nurse about that time, but it's like 45 seconds and she is back to sleep, but these last few nights, she just wants to play with her toes and giggle and pinch my nose. It has taken me 30 minutes to an hour to get her back to sleep and by then it is almost time for me to get up for work. I have been frustrated and tired to say the least.

Here is the thing, both nights she has been awake at the same time Smug-Hub has been making noise. The first night it was when he came to bed and the second night he was snoring. Both nights, I yelled at him and said mean things about him being inconsiderate of my need to get up at 4:30 in the morning and how this was all his fault. Then when I checked e-mail yesterday morning, I found three e-mails from parenting sites on how sleeping habits can change at this age and how important routine is for maintaining good sleep.

Well, this made me feel like dog poo for blaming Smug-Hub for all my woes and I sent him an apology e-mail. I felt that I was blaming him for something that may or may not have had anything to do with Smug-Baby waking up and that yelling at a sleeping man and saying hurtful things in the middle of the night is really unproductive and doesn't help the situation one bit.

Last night, she again woke at 2:30am, I moved around to switch sides and she nursed for about 15 minutes and then fell back asleep. As I lay there falling back asleep myself I got to thinking, she is almost 6 months old and I have read that at about 6 months babies have a growth spurt. Maybe she is waking because she is hungry and only staying awake because of the increased noise of daddy's snores.

Regardless, I slept better last night and don't feel that sleep deprived headache, so that's good. I haven't dealt with much sleeplessness due to co-sleeping with Smug-Baby and I am beyond grateful for that, so I really shouldn't complain about a few nights of issues.

Smug-Hub and I have discussed the importance of his coming to bed at a certain time and the importance of him wearing his CPAP mask to help Smug-Baby stay asleep, so I think that we may have worked through this little issue for now. Let's just hope that I don't start yelling at him next time I am awoken in the middle of the night to feeling those soft little fingers trying to explore my nose!!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Welcome!

Good Morning, it's Tuesday and it is going to be about 1,000 degrees out today! OK, not 1,000, just 97 but still... Today my niece is scheduled to be born and I am totally excited for my sister.

I feel so excited, probably more excited than I have a right to be, but I am anyway. I want to hold my sister's hand and tell her everything is going to be fine. I want to hold and squeeze the new little life that has decided to come join our family!

This is a new thing for our family. This is the first scheduled delivery, scheduled c-section. When Smug-Nephew 1 was born, my sister was induced and planned to have a natural delivery, but 60 hours of labor later he was delivered by c-section. When I had my daughter, Smug-baby, I went into labor naturally in the middle of the night, so there hasn't been this particular type of anticipation before and we are all jumping out of our skin!

I hope that everything happens as it is supposed to and on time and in just a few hours I will be holding my new niece and thinking how tiny she is compared with Smug-baby!!