Thursday, January 13, 2011


When someone you love is or may be depressed what should you do? Do you call them constantly just to let them know that you care? Do you leave them alone to work through things in their own time? Do you something of a combination? Let them work through things, but call or text occasionally to let them know that you are still thinking of them? Should you confront someone you think may be depressed? What if you are wrong and they are fine, just don't really want to be your friend anymore?

What about when you are feeling depressed yourself? Do you reach out to your friends and family? Do you sit back and wait for them to come to you? Does that even enter into your thinking when depressed?

I am not and have never been depressed as far as the clinical term means, but I have had moments when I felt like I might be drowning and wondering how I was going to get through all of it. I know that I have needed to rely on my husband, friends and family to help me focus on the good that my life offers and not be dragged down by the negative and normally, I stay depressed or down for a few hours or a day and then I look at my daughter's smile and everything is right with the world again.

I have friends that I know have been depressed and I never know how to handle things. I want them to know that I love them and will be there if and when they need anything from me, but I don't want to pester and bug them. I don't want my need to be their friend and be there for them to become another source of unhappiness for them.

What brings on depression? Some major life event? A slow realization that your life is not making you happy? Is there anything that a friend can do? I want very much to be a good friend to those I love and I am lost on how much is enough and how much is too much when depression may be a factor. Any advice for me?

1 comment:

  1. It really depends on how bad it is. I've had two very bad depressions that were brought on by very tramic things in my life. No one understand, and was actually told by people closes to me to get over it. Well, if it was that easy, I would have. When, I started having irrational thoughts, that's when I went to the doctor and got meds, that I took for about 6 months. That's what I would look for, if they start talking crazy talk.
    Definitely, tell your friend you're there for them, and listen even if it seems like the same thing over again. Look for that irrational thinking. It's not something you need to bring up. Call and ask your friend over or out. If it's something they want to talk about they will. It's definitely something that has a thin line of over stepping and under stepping. You do what you feel you can handle.
    All you can do is put it out there that you are there, and the rest is up to them.