Thursday, April 7, 2011

The Importance of Not Compromising

Sometimes I need some help and I go to Smug-Grandma and ask her for said help, or sometimes I want to do something I ask Smug-Grandma to go with me, or sometimes I want to have a family party and I ask Smug-Grandma to join. In all of these cases a lot of times, Smug-Grandma says no. She says no because whatever I am asking will interfere with her ability to take a class at her gym. I grumble about how working out is more important than her family and generally feel put upon about it.

Here is the thing, Smug-Grandma needs exercises to maintain her ability to function. Her physical needs are such that without constant exercise she will not be able to help me, to go with me, or join in family fun. She knows the importance of exercise in her life and she doesn't (often) skip it to do something else.

I need exercise to maintain my ability to function as well. I feel wonderful after a good workout and I have all this energy that I didn't know I was missing. I am more fun to be around for my daughter as I have the energy to chase her around the living room and cover her in tickling kisses. I feel stronger and sexier when I feel my muscles taut with recent exercise and that makes me feel more attractive to my husband (he would say that he always finds me attractive, but often I don't feel like I am and therefore avoid adult activities). I more easily turn down foods that are bad for me when I have had a workout because I don't want to undo all that sweating. But, exercise is the first thing that gets moved to tomorrow (the eternal tomorrow don't ya know), and is the first thing that I make excuses not to do. Why is this??

How do I get to where Smug-Grandma is? Where working out is not a choice, not an optional activity?

I am a vegetarian. I have been all my life and I never compromise and have just a little something. I know that dairy is not only bad for me and my digestion, but also has a horrible effect on my child and yet, I compromise on that all the time. Have a little cheese ball here and a piece of cake there and before you know it, I am in trouble with stomach pains and a baby who can't breathe from all the mucus in her nose and throat. Every time, I vow that this is the last time and next time I will be strong enough to say no and every time I cave. Why is this? I never cave and eat meat. I never cave and drink caffeine. Where is my resolve and my willpower when it comes to dairy? Don't even get me started on sugar...

My goals for next week are to eat cleanly and to establish a workout routine. I am not working for my sister next week, so I WILL find the time to workout and make high quality meals for myself and my family. I have to do better for own health and well being, but for those I love as well.

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