Sleep

Since the purchase of the new bed, I expected that I would be sleeping like a rock each and every night. That, sadly, has not happened. It appears to me that Smug-Baby is having a hard time adjusting to having so much room and thus thinks she is alone and wakes up.

This results in marathon nursing to get her back to sleep and me laying awake either because of an uncomfortable nursing position or because I am fully awake or worse yet, because I am fully awake and know that I have X minutes left to sleep and the pressure to fall back asleep as fast as possible is keeping me awake.

So, we have been tweaking our bedtime routine some. We put Smug-Baby in the exact middle and then we scoot in really close in an effort to make sure that she feels us there and can sleep without feeling as though we have abandoned her. We are bringing a water cup to bed, so that if she wakes and asks for "ice" we don't have to get up and turn on lights to get it for her. We are also going to bed mostly at the same time she does in the hopes that we will get some sleep before she wakes us.

In the last two weeks all those ideas have been put into place to varying degrees of success, as in, mostly without success! We generally are able to do some of the above but not all. Last night though, we did it! All the pieces were in place and I personally slept like a rock until the alarm went off at 3:54am (I have been going into work early to make up the time I missed being sick on Monday). I was finishing in the shower when I heard Smug-Baby start crying. I tried to finish getting ready for work and see if Smug-Hub was able to get her back to sleep, but she just ended up hysterical. By that time, even nursing wasn't going to make her go back to sleep so a banana was sliced and Elmo was turned on. Every time I leave her sight to gather something for work, she cries. She knows that I am leaving. I hate leaving.

She is laughing at Mr. Noodle's brother Mr. Noodle, so I am going to sneak out. Wish me luck :)

Oh Yeah, I Remember This Feeling

Waiting.

I am again waiting.

I wait for the day on the calendar that is the day I can take that all important test. I wait for the blood that will tell me that another month will pass without taking that all important test. I wait for the signs, the tiredness, the sore boobs, the sick feeling in my stomach that will tell me that he or she has decided to join our family.

Are you still out there Little-Smug? Waiting for the right time? Or are you already here? Living within me?

I have found myself putting things on hold while I wait. I was going to order a new pair of jeans that are on sale on Amazon, but decided not to because I may not be able to wear them for long.

I was playing on the floor with Smug-Baby and Smug-Niece and they were blowing bubbles on my belly and it was tickling and I was laughing and they were laughing and I wondered if Little-Smug could feel the vibrations and hear the laughter of both mama and girls.

I remember this feeling. The hope. I remember knowing the second Smug-Baby was conceived and worried that I don't feel that way this month and worried that I won't be pregnant and seeing the negative test will be like losing all over again, only this time I know so much more about what I would be losing.

I don't like waiting... Also, the sooner I know for sure the sooner I can get ready for morning sickness or alternatively, feel relieved about not having morning sickness :)

I don't like waiting :(

Am I Crazy?... Don't Answer That

Smug-Hub and I have decided that we would like to expand our family and now seems like a really good time to make that happen. There are financial reasons and due date reasons. There are age issues and cuddly baby desires. We know that we want more than one child, and have decided that we need to get moving, because if it takes us another 2 years to get pregnant, like it did with Smug-Baby...

Then I have a day like today. That started at 9:30 Sunday evening when I went to bed. I was already feeling a little sick from all the junk food eaten throughout the day and maybe Smug-Baby was too, because she was all over the place all night long! She tossed and turned and rolled and flipped and flopped and scooted and wiggled all while staying firmly attached to me! So much so that she soaked through 2 (yes TWO!!) diapers during the night. She didn't stop nursing all night long. I felt sick to my stomach from the junk and lack of sleep. My mouth was dry and my head was pounding. Needless to say, when the alarm went off at 4, I sent an e-mail to my boss and tried to get back to sleep. I think that I slept from about 5 to about 7, but other than that I was up all night!

Then it was time to start the day. I made breakfast and got laundry working. I cleaned up the kitchen and took a shower with Smug-Baby and got us both dressed and out the door. I arrived at Smug-Sister's place and learned that her husband and driven all night long to get home from his trip and was just as, (or more) sleep deprived as I was. The girls seemed tired by about 11:30, so I took Smug-BIL to return his rental car while the girls napped and I ended up back at my house about 12:30.

I worked on laundry and fed the girls lunch and had some myself. I folded laundry and played with babies until about 2:30 when they both were acting tired again. We did some butt changes and headed out the door again. They napped until almost 4 when I returned Smug-Niece to her family and headed home.

I was so tired that I couldn't comprehend dinner, so I picked up food from Chipotle for Smug-Baby and I before heading home to finish the laundry and change the sheets on the bed. Smug-Baby seemed like she was on a hair trigger, everything upsetting her. She knows that she is not supposed to play with the electrical cords/plugs, but did anyway which, besides from the electrocution danger, also unplugged my clock, so I had to re-set that and the alarm settings, so I put her in a time out for about 15 seconds but that was enough to upset her so badly that she was crying hard enough to cause her to gag and choke! It was crazy!

She is in the bath now and rather than playing she is fussing. She isn't grabbing her mouth much so it doesn't seem like teething. Her diapers seem normal, so it doesn't seem like her belly is upset. She could just be tired from the rough night last night I guess. Let's just hope that she goes down early tonight and sleeps soundly!!

Its days like today where I am so tired and so stretched that I wonder if I am totally nuts for thinking about having another baby... I remember being worried about how I would fit having a baby into my already overly busy life when I was trying to get pregnant with Smug-Baby and I have adjusted pretty well. Also, I think that you do what you have to do, so I know that I will rise to the challange and do just fine with two, but still...

New Bed

Quick post to let everyone know that I am now the proud owner of a king size bed! It is amazing and enoumious and wonderful!! We had friends over for dinner last night and were up late getting Smug-Baby back to sleep when our fun evening woke her, but once I got to actually sleep... I slept hard!! It was wonderful!!

Go me!!

Bed Delivery Issues

As I have stated before, I am obsessed with my new bed purchase. I called hh Gregg on Monday and was told that my bed was in their warehouse but they didn't deliver on Tuesday or Thursday, so it would be Wednesday when they delivered my bed. I was told that I would be called Wednesday morning and they would give me a 3 hour window in which to expect them.

Wednesday morning dawned bright and Smug-Hub and I were so excited that we were almost unable to sleep the night before. As the morning ticked by and the phone didn't ring, I grew concerned. I had Smug-Sister text her friend who worked there and he sent a text back saying that the bed wasn't in stock and would not be delivered. He was supposed to have someone call me at 9:30 that morning to explain.

By 10:15 I felt that I had waited long enough. I called and just told them that I had a delivery scheduled for today and no one had called to let me know when to expect them. She says that it was a really funny story, but only the mattress was in and they hadn't realized that when she had told me it was in and scheduled the delivery. I told her that we had dismantled our waterbed in preparation for the bed being delivered and would be sleeping on the floor until they were able to deliver the bed and what was she going to do about it and when, for the love of God, would I be receiving my bed?!?!?!?

She put me on hold and another manager got on the phone and proceeded to tell me that this bed is the number one selling bed in America right now and Serta only manufacturers to order and he didn't have any idea when the base for my bed would be delivered. I explained that I was assured that my bed was in stock when I purchased it and also if Serta makes to order, why would they have made a mattress without a base? I told him that we would be sleeping on the floor and the bill for the bed was due on Friday; that I would be making payments for a bed that I didn't even possess. He never once said he was sorry for the situation, offering only to contact his buyer to see if they could give him a better date for shipping.

Finally, I told him to deliver the mattress today so we would have somewhere to sleep until they could figure out where the base was and when it would arrive. He said that he needed to talk to his delivery team and would call me right back...

By 1:00pm, I was really pissed that I hadn't heard back from him, so I called Grand Home Functioning’s on the off chance that they would have one in their warehouse. The salesman I spoke to was very nice and told me that they had 5 in there warehouse and could deliver anytime this week. I asked him about delivery on Thursday and he said that was fine. He also told me that they had the bed on sale for the same price as hh Gregg, offered free delivery (truly free delivery, not delivery that I had to pay for up front and be sent a refund check 6-8 weeks later like hh Gregg) and the same 24 months no interest. I was sold!

I called back hh Gregg and spoke to the manager from the first call that morning and told her that Grand had the beds in stock and could deliver the following day so I wanted to cancel my order with her and purchase from Grand. She said that was fine and she would process my refund and it should show on my card within 7-10 days. She never apologized for my inconvenience. She never offered me a discount on something else to get me back in the store. She never offered me anything to try to keep me from canceling my $2,300 order!! NOTHING!!! I had been feeling kind of bad about canceling since they work on commission and I have enjoyed everything I have bought from them in the past, but after that... Not anymore!

I arrived at Grand (with both the girls I might add) and met up with the salesman I spoke to on the phone. He showed me the bed, but since I already knew what I wanted, we moved quickly on to the credit application and processing of the sale and setting up the delivery for tomorrow. Again, they are supposed to call in the morning to let me know when to expect them and I am a little once-bitten-twice-shy on believing that it will actually happen, but everyone at Grand was super nice and they even gave each of the girls a little stuffed animal.

So, as I prepare for bed tonight, I am cautiously excited that tonight will be the last night without my new bed. The last night of waking up with a headache and backache. The last night of feeling like I am going to roll onto the floor from being squashed! We will see if they actually call...

Here's to hope!!

Groupon Concerns

If I owned a small business or even a big business for that matter and I was trying to decide how to attract new clients and I have a small advertising or marketing budget, how would I do it?

Well, Groupon seems really cool to me, the consumer, so I would think that it would be pretty cool for the business too! It’s like a win-win! The client gets my services at a reduced rate and I have the chance to wow them into coming back and paying full price for another of my services.

This all sounds great, unless my business is full of employees who want to sabotage my success!

I bring all this up because over the last two weekends I had a Groupon experience that, while fine with me, would have really upset me had I been the owner of the business. The Groupon was for a salon called Plaza 101 for an airbrush tanning session.

I called them on August 1st, a Monday and explained that I had a Groupon and needed to make an appointment. The chick on the phone made my appointment for Saturday at 1pm and we got off the phone. It was nice and straightforward, nothing to write home about.

When I arrived for my appointment about 10 minutes early, I walked into the salon and up to the reception desk. The man behind the desk was putting a Netflix movie into its return envelope, so I just said "Hello, I have an appointment at 1 for an airbrush tan, my name is Smug Mama" He looked up at me with such irritation and condescension I almost took a step backward. He told me to have a seat and someone would be with me soon. I sat down and started flipping through a magazine.

About 10 minutes after 1, during which time, he had left and come back from Sonic with a milkshake, but never once told anyone I was there, a woman walked by and asked who I was waiting for. I explained that I had a Groupon for airbrush tanning and an appointment for 1pm. She said that "she" (whoever that was I never learned) was running late and was I in a hurry. Since I had already been there for 20 minutes, I simply asked how late was "she" going to be. The woman said she wasn't sure, but to come with her and she would get me started. As we walked back through the salon she asked me if I had exfoliated really well. "No" I replied, "No one mentioned that I needed to do anything special when I made the appointment, do I need to reschedule?" "No" She said, "normally you need to exfoliate beforehand or the tan will not adhere, but we will see what we can do for you today." Then she stopped and asked me if I had showered that morning and used lotion. "Yes, of course" I replied. She shook her head and told me that we would need to reschedule.

Then she made me a new appointment, gave me some free exfoliation stuff and a card for $10 off a pedicure. While I was irritated that I had wasted all this time, I felt like she handled it great! She was apologetic; she gave me something free, took care of the issue to the best of her ability and gave me something to get me back to spend more money.

So, the following weekend, I arrive with Groupon in hand and Mr. Personality again tells me to have a seat, when the women who helped me before noticed me, remembered me and the situation and took me back to the treatment. Now, a side note on the air brush tanning. The description of the service said that their certified tanning experts would mix the color to just the right blend for my skin and my desired results. That didn't really happen; she didn't ask me if I wanted to be really dark or just a light covering nothing. She just sprayed it on and to be honest, I am a little more orange than I would have liked, but overall it was fine. My clothes were horribly stained at the end of the day, but most of the stains came out in the wash.

Then I had to stay in the room for about 15 minutes with a hand-held fan drying myself. Then she came back and told me I was free to get dressed. She never checked to see if I was "dry" or check over the finished look to make sure nothing was missed or splotchy. When I got back up front she wasn't in sight. I went to the desk and pulled out my appointment book to make the appointment for pedicure and maybe even reschedule for another application of spray tan. Mr. Personality wandered over and I handed him my Groupon. He said "bye now" I said "I'm all done?"  He did a condescending smile and nodded so I put my appointment book away and walked out.

He was my first and last impression of the salon and he is the reason that I will probably not go back for my $10 off pedicure. He was snotty and condescending and rude. He had a perfect opportunity to offer me a menu of other services, offer to make me a follow up appointment and leave me feeling like I wanted to come back. He failed on all counts. I'm not sure what it is about salon reception staff, but I have found this treatment before, like they are so much better than I am. Why, because they work in a salon? I can't imagine answering the phone and telling clients to sit commands much of a paycheck, but I could be wrong.

So, if I were the owner of the salon, thinking about where to put my advertising dollars, I may think that Groupon wasn't very successful because the new clients hadn't re-booked for full price services. However, it wasn't Groupon's fault that the person making the first impression on clients wasn't the right person for the job.

I believe that you have to wow new clients when you are in the non-essential services business. I don't NEED a spray tan; it is a luxury purchase, a treat to myself. Also, I can get a spray tan at no less than a dozen other salons all over town, what is going to make me spend my hard earned, hard to come by, cash on your salon? Business owners have an opportunity to build their customer base and earn customer loyalty by treating them like they are special. Plaza 101 failed to do that, not so much by the service itself or the technician who preformed it, who were perfectly fine. It was that first impression and last impression as I headed out the door.

If I was the owner, I would be firing Mr. Personality and working extra hard to make sure that the new clients walking through the door stayed!!

Obsessed

Smug-Hub and I have become obsessed with our new bed. So much so that we spent several hours this weekend re-arranging the bedroom furniture and washing the baseboards and walls and packing up old clothes and his winter stuff to make more room. We carefully checked all the plugs to make sure that we had the optimal lamp spacing for good light (our bedroom has no overhead lighting! Who thought that was smart when they were building I wonder?!?!?) We went to Wal-Mart to get organizers for Smug-Hub's clothes, so that all his stuff fits into the closets and all my stuff fits into the dresser and half of one of the closets.

We vacuumed all around and used the measuring tape to make sure that the spot we picked out for the bed will fit. I have washed all the sheets and other bedding and purchased decorative throw pillows and euro pillows and new sleeping pillows. We have spent a good deal of money that we didn't really have to make sure that once the new bed arrives we will be sleeping in luxury and comfort. We sort of figure that good, quality sleep is important and you don't buy a mattress everyday or sheets or any of that stuff and we wanted the best we could afford!!

When Smug-Baby woke up from her nap, she was a little shocked to see all the changes and no bed in our bedroom, but we took her downstairs to show her the old bed and told her that we would be sleeping down there until the new bed arrived. She seemed fine with it and slept just fine all night, so I guess she adjusted :)

We have finally gotten rid of everything in the bedroom that I had when my first serious boyfriend and I were living together. We actually purchased both the shelf that I have been using for my clothes and the headboard and floorboard for the bed as gifts for me over our time together. Now both of those are no longer in use. I purchased the mattress when we were together and within a few days I will no longer be sleeping in a bed I shared with someone else. There is something about purging items connected to bad memories that is very therapeutic!

We would eventually like to get new furniture, like matching dressers and night tables, but we didn't find anything we loved at a price we were comfortable with and to be honest, I would rather spend money on new appliances for the kitchen than on a dresser and matching tables. We will get there, but we need to pay off the bed first and I think that we would like to move our bedroom into the downstairs room at some point, but that room needs a lot of work before we can do that.

Moving our room downstairs would be really nice once Smug-Baby and any other future kids are a little bigger. They could have the two upstairs rooms and with the bathroom downstairs, Smug-Hub and I would have a space all our own. However, Smug-Baby is still sleeping with us and I don't have any desire to have her sleep upstairs and me downstairs until she is a lot bigger and if any other children come along we wouldn't want to be a floor away from them either. That gives Smug-Hub some time to get the shelving built, the bathroom finished, the closet done, the laundry room stuff done and painting! THEN, we will get new bedroom furniture!!

I am hoping and praying that in a few hours I will get a call that they can deliver the bed today. Failing that, please pray that it is tomorrow!!!! I am beyond anxious!! You couldn't tell that at all could you?!?!?

Behind

So, I am running behind on my list of tasks, its Wednesday night and I haven't gone to the grocery store yet (Tuesday task) and I didn't complete Wednesday's task of deep cleaning the bathroom yet and the diapers are still in the dryer and it doesn't look like I am going to finish tonight.

It's late. Its almost 10 and Smug-Baby is all ready for bed and having some time with her daddy before I drag her off to sleep with me. We spent most of the day at the house with Smug-Niece waiting for an AC repair guy, but I did use the time wisely and between playing with the girls and giving them snacks I did work on deep cleaning the bathroom. They helped a lot by unrolling the toilet paper and emptying the contents of the trash can one item at a time and helpfully distributing it all over the floor. It was really hot and they shared two full sippy cups of ice water throughout the day.

The AC guy didn't show, but I wasn't totally expecting him either. Here is that story: We noticed that the AC was out on Tuesday afternoon and after my neighbor was so kind as to check it out for me and give me the phone number to his AC repair guy, it was too late to get a hold of anyone. So, first thing this morning I called the people who fixed it last year. The woman on the phone was snippy and gave me a hard time about having to "work me in" because I didn't have a service contract with them. She said that Thursday would be the soonest they could get to me and she didn't have a time of day and couldn't have him call me before he headed over. She basically told me that I would need to stay in my 1,000 degree house all day and wait for the guy to arrive. I agreed finally, but when I hung up I called Henry (the guy my neighbor told me about) and he was very sympathetic and said that he would try his best to get to be today, but if nothing else he would be by first thing Thursday morning. I appreciated that he seemed to care that it was hot and I have a baby and didn't want to hang out there all day waiting for him.

Regardless, I knew that I wanted to be close if he was able to make it to today, hence the steamy bathroom cleaning with two "helpers".

I left to take Smug-Niece home about 4 and spent some time hanging with Smug-Sister and Smug-Grandma and we sang happy birthday to the sweet girl before I headed off to do the bedding shopping with Smug-Hub. Smug-Baby had a great time running around and jumping and flopping on all the bedding displays and we went to all the stores within the mall to get an idea of what each other liked and ended up back at Macy's to get the first one we looked it. I like it a lot, but I'm not over the moon about it. The one that we really loved and was super soft was actually just a comforter cover and those things are total crap (the comforter falls down with any movement and then you end up with a bunched up comforter at the bottom of the bed while you are shivering under thin fabric - its crap!!) AND it was $400 for two pieces of fabric sewn together!!!!! it was really pretty and soft and comfortable though :(

We ended up with this and it is soft and comfortable and I like it. It is not too "girl-y" or too masculine and we are happy with it. I am really excited about the great sheets I got yesterday so that makes up for not being totally in love with the comforter. We also got some King size pillows that we were on sale and then went to the buffet for dinner where Smug-Baby ate her weight in mashed potatoes and spit out all the bites of broccoli, cauliflower and mushrooms we tried to sneak into her mouth.

Then it was home for a nice, hot, sticky bath and bedtime routine and I am sitting her, fingers sticking to the keyboard, sweating. All the windows are open and the fan is working on cooling the bedroom, but it is going to be a rough one folks...

UPDATE:

Henry called about 10:30 waking me from a dead sleep. He apologized for not making it over and plans to be at our house at 7:30 this morning. I told him he was wonderful and went back to sleep. When I woke up this morning about 4, I was still hot and sticky so I just got up and got into the shower. After I was ready for work, I had some time before I needed to leave, so I took the opportunity to finish a few tasks in the bathroom. Now when I get home today, I need only to clean the sink and mirror, wash the light fixture, and wipe down the walls and baseboards. I still need to hit the grocery store at some point and wash all the bedding to get ready for the bed delivery, but all that is totally doable between today and tomorrow!! Back on track - this is what happens when your goals and tasks are manageable and your house is staying (sort of) clean!!

AC... or Lack There Of...

I came home today exhausted. I walked into the house with the diaper bag over one shoulder, my work bag over the other. I had the mail in one hand and a shopping bag from Bed, Bath and Beyond in the other. Oh and did I mention a child who has not wanted to be put down all day?

I struggled up the stairs and into the main house where I could deposit all my bundles (minus the child) on the kitchen table. I was sweating. I noticed that it was way too hot even given my exertion and went to check the AC thermostat. The thermostat wasn't one, like no numbers on the display. I fiddled with it, turning it off and back on and whatnot. Then I went to the garage to check the breaker box and flipped a few of those off and back on (yes, I made sure they were the ones labeled AC - you have no faith in me people!)

Finally, I determined that I was not going to be able to fix it. Dad is out of town and Smug-Hub wasn't due to get home for a couple of hours so I called my next door neighbor and he came over to see if he could fix it. 

After replacing the thermostat and playing with the breaker box and AC unit itself he pronounced that he was not able to fix it and gave me the name of a guy he used for his AC repair. I called the number and the voicemail told me that "Henry" wasn't available, then the nice lady on the message informed me that Henry's voicemail was full and not able to accept any new messages. 

Then I called the company who fixed it last year and their line range about 3 times before the call dropped. I called again and this repeated about 5 times until I gave up. Did I mention that I was sweating and trying to hold a sweaty, crying, clingy baby this whole time AND trying to fix dinner???? I was feeling the stress!!!!

This is all after a day where I spent the afternoon (again with the clingy baby) pre-shopping for bedding for the new bed. Smug-Hub is going to join me tomorrow after work to try to pick out the bedding and I thought that since I was finished at Smug-Sister's early it would be a good idea to narrow down the list of places we thought might have something we would like. I ruled out J.C. Penny's, Marshall's and Target, but found things that I liked at Macy's and Bed, Bath & Beyond. I also found some sheets on sale at BBB so I picked those up, thinking that if worse came to worse and we couldn't find something we liked, at least we would have sheets!!

Smug-Baby spent the shopping trip alternating between running off on her own throughout the store and wanting to be held. I put her in my ring sling and that kept her happily connected to me while I shopped, but it didn't last but for two stores, then she wanted to get down and run around the displays and throw pillows around! Fun stuff!!

I made Pad Thai from Pea's and Thank You and it was really, really good! Even Smug-Hub was impressed. He said it had too many veggies in it, which I kind of think is funny considering it is a veggie dish and he would have liked chicken instead of tofu, but he ate seconds, so I think all in all it was a hit!

Once we got the fan blowing and some windows open, I cleaned up the kitchen and am typing this up now while daddy and baby play on the floor. I hope that I can get in touch with the AC guys first thing in the morning and get this fixed right away! I hate being hot, it makes me sticky and cranky and much less patient than I am normally.

Oh well... So, how was your day?? 

Bed

I have been waking up with headaches and backaches for a long time now. I thought at first that it was because I was pregnant and being huge was causing my back to hurt. Then I thought it was because I was side-lying nursing and that was causing strain on my back. Then I thought it was because I was sort of squished between Smug-Hub and Smug-Baby some nights. I have decided now that it is the fact that our bed is 1) too small (queen) for three large people (OK, so Smug-Baby isn't that large, but she is tall for her age and her daddy and I are both big, so we take up her space) and 2) it is over 15 years old and was cheap to begin with.

I want a new bed. I asked Smug-Hub is we could go looking for a new bed and I thought he was going to jump out of his skin with excitement! He tells me that he also has been very uncomfortable for several years now and has been wanting a new bed. We talk about it before heading to the store that we are not going to buy a bed today, we are just going to look...

Two hours later and $2,100 lighter we have a new king sized bed to be delivered next Friday (8/19). It is the Serta version of the Tempur-Pedic bed, called iComfort, and it was a lot less expensive. It also has a 25 year warranty, so if at any time in the next 25 years we find that we are not sleeping as well as we do in the beginning, they will come out and repair or replace the bed. Also, there is a 6 month trial period, so if we get it home and decide we don't like it after a few months, we can return it for a full refund. It was also on sale by about $400 AND no interest for 24 months. So, as long as we pay $100 a month on the card, at the end of the two years, it will be paid for with no interest charges.

I am really excited. We got the flat version, but they offer a version with massage and adjustable head and foot stuff. We figured that we didn't really need that and we hadn't needed it in the past and probably wouldn't use it anyway.

So, just a few more nights of being squished and waking up with pain an headaches before our new bed arrives!

Now, I have to purchase sheets and stuff (yeah, I know, a hardship!!) and also figure out how this new big bed is going to fit into the bedroom....

Happy

I woke up this morning just before the alarm was supposed to go off. I turned it off so it wouldn't buzz and lay there a moment waking up. I was in the middle, cuddled between my husband and my sweet girl. They were both on their backs, hands behind their heads, one knee up in the air. I can't believe how much alike they are! I smiled as I watched them sleep and realized that it was Friday. My last day of work for the week and the final day of my weekly tasks around the house. Tomorrow I can sleep until I wake up, stay in bed until I want to get up and cuddle with my family until all our emotional cups are overflowing with love!

I felt really happy. I noticed that I had a smile on my face when I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and shower. I sang all the way into work and got a lot accomplished before I left for the day. I enjoyed a nice breakfast that included TWO whole pieces of toast! I was living on the edge man!!

I spent the day with my dear child, who after some separation anxiety, has decided that she likes playing in her bedroom for long periods of time (like 10 whole minutes) by herself with the door shut. She just knocks when she is ready to come back into the rest of the house. It is really cute! I worked on stuff around the house, knocking out not only my daily task of dusting, vacuuming and mopping, but I gathered up stuff for the Goodwill and did the deep cleaning tasks for the master bedroom. I'm already ahead of the game!

I made a nice dinner of burgers with potato salad, steamed asparagus and cauliflower and this zucchini, squash and corn dish and some corn on the cob. Mostly I made all this because the veggies were starting to look like they might be headed for the great veggie patch in the sky! It was nice and we sat around talking and laughing and watch Smug-Baby eat most of an entire ear of corn all by herself.

It was a good day and I foresee a lovely weekend!

I start counseling next week to deal with all my constant unhappiness. Could it be that my sub-conscious has worked through whatever was bothering me so much and now I don't even need counseling? I'm still going to go, but it was almost like the act of taking control of things and making the appointment was the defining factor and started me back on the right track. We will see I suppose!

Bumps

I was folding laundry last night and Smug-Hub had taken Smug-Baby outside to "help" him water the plants. I heard the garage door close and them moving around downstairs. Then my heart went into my throat and I went still listening. I had heard something fall or smack. I knew the sound before I knew what had happened. There was no crying, I thought maybe I was imagning things, then I heard her gasp for air and the scream came next. Smug-Hub was calling to me and coming up the stairs even I moved around the couch to get to her.

To my paniked eyes the whole side of her face looked bashed in and the large purple lump was already visible. I took her little pain riddled body in my arms and rocked her and mermered softly to her while I got her positioned and myself free and her latched on. She nursed and pulled away to cry more and then nursed again. Smug-Hub had run to the freezer for some ice and by the time he returned she was calmer and even pulled away when we applied the ice to her head, which now we could see was just bumped and not bashed. I think that between the panic and her face contorted from pain and the terrible lighting in the living room, it just looked worse than it was.

Once she was calm and nursing and the ice had done its work, Smug-Hub explained that she had tripped over the vacuum cleaner and while she put her hands out to catch herself, the momentium had carried her face right into the concrete of the laundry room floor. We both felt sick to our stomach's and called our friend who is a retired doctor and she told us that babies are bendy and made to withstand falls like this. We both called our mom's for double reassurance too, but by then Smug-Baby was playing happily in the bath and Smug-Hub and I almost collasped from the sudden depletion of all our adrenaline!

I'm so glad that she is fine. It was really scary...

Recaping The Week

The last week was very hard on me but it was even harder on my poor Smug-Baby. She was cutting yet another tooth (she is down to only needing 1 more and then her two-year molars) and on Tuesday night spiked a 103 temperature. She woke up, sat up and said “ice” (her word for water) about 30 times until Smug-Hub was able to grab her sippy cup and then she drank like she was parched! This was after staying latched on most of the night!! Needless to say, she had a rough day on Wednesday. It was my busiest day and my BIL was off work and watching the girls so Smug-Sister and I could work.

Backing up, I am working on my quarterly project and have been running up and down the stairs trying to work and still be a good mom and there for my sweet girl, but every time I had to go back to work or attend a meeting I would have to leave and she would scream. Which is no fun for her to be sure, but horrible for my BIL who had to try to calm and distract her and beyond horrible for me who had to sit in my meetings listening to my child who is clearing communicating her needs to me and I am not coming to her aid. She trusted me to be there for her in her times of need and I (to her mind) had abandoned her! It was awful and I am so glad that it is over finally.

The fallout has been hard because now Smug-Baby bursts into hysterics if I leave her line of sight. We can be hanging in the living room and I walk into the kitchen, out of her eyesight and she notices and begins to scream until she can see me again. I feel horrible that she is having trouble and I am not looking forward to October when I have to do this all again L

On a positive note, I was able to keep up on my daily tasks and weekly project for the most part throughout the week and was rewarded with a free weekend to hang with my family and our friends. We had Saturday brunch with my sister’s family, Saturday afternoon we drove to a friend’s lake house for swimming, visiting and dinner. Sunday we had a nice relaxed morning and then had some long-lost friends over for lunch. After they left about 3:30, Smug-Grandma came over and told us all about her trip to Belize. I didn’t have anything hanging over my head, the house looked nice and I was at peace knowing that I have a plan of attack for the whole house!

After I spend another week or so tweaking and perfecting my daily and weekly schedules there are a couple of things that I want to tackle next. One being, fitness. I need to spend some time figuring out how to add exercise to those daily and weekly schedules. I think that once I have the house stuff under control and running smoothly, it will not feel such a daunting task to add another element. Second, is food. I really want to have healthy snacks on hand, healthy food in the freezer for those busier days and a good, plant-based meal every night, on the table when Smug-Hub gets home from work. This is another area that needs a bit of thought and planning to get it to fit into my life in a way that doesn’t cause panic or frustration. Once I have those two tasks integrated, all the areas of my life should be getting the attention they need and deserve and I will finally have found the balance that I so desperately seek!!